New Blog.

Just wanted to remind anyone who is still reading this blog that I have opened up my new blog to everyone. The password protection kept out more people that I wanted to see the blog than those I did not. So change your own blog to reflect that you are following the new blog. I noticed that most of you still have a link to this page on your blog. In case you haven't found it, it is www.hammondgirls.blogspot.com. Or you can go to my profile and find a link to it.

My new-found wisdom...

Those who know me know that I have an amazing ability to take things that could potentially be negative and life-ruining circumstances and use them as an opportunity for personal growth. I haven't always been like this, but I think my education has helped...after all, I have taken actual classes entirely about human and family resilience. Here is a list I have been inspired to compose and share in light of my recent circumstances.



Things I have learned...

1. Divorce does not mean it is the end and does not have to break up families. In fact, if all parties involved are mature and positive, it can actually be an opportunity to grow closer once again.


2. Those who hurt you the most were only able to do so because you love them the most.


3. It is much easier to forgive than forget.


4. It is much easier to forget acts of wrong-doing against you than it is to forget hurtful words that were said to you and/or about you.


5. Those who say bad things about you rarely mean them. It is more of a personal issue within themselves and attacking you is a very effective short-term coping mechanism.


6. Children really are more happy in healthy divorce situations than in tension-filled homes (the research was actually right!)


7. Money can and will destroy a very good relationship if you allow it to.


8. Speaking of which, life is MUCH better and relationships are MUCH easier without money, which leads to #8...


9. Being broke actually can equal happiness.


10. Life never turns out the way you thought it would.


11. Striving to better the lives of others will inadvertently better yours.


12. There will NEVER be anything more important in this world than your children are.


13. There is nothing worth protecting more than your children.


14. Everyone seems to know exactly what you should do or should have done except those people that you genuinely seek advice from, including close friends and marriage counselors you see for 8 months alike :)


15. Nothing in life is certain, no matter how financially secure you think you are, how tight-knit your family is, how blissful your marriage is, how healthy your kids are, etc. A turn of events can throw it all off in a heartbeat. This has led to the realization of # 16...


16. It is absolutely imperative that you stop and "smell the roses" every single day.


17. The majority of people who are married have some type of marital problem. When they hear about your divorce, they either confide in you about them, or use your problems to continue to deny theirs. Either way, I figure my situation is helping people.


18. When you are happily married, other happily married friends are hard to find. When you become single and heart-broken, you are suddenly surrounded with happy couples. I have concluded that this is to force you to fall in love with yourself again.


19. Divorce is much like being 18 all over again. You move out of the house, make your own decisions, take on much more responsibility, and grow twice as fast because of it.


20. "Family" and "Friends" should actually be combined into one word and share a definition. There is really nothing that sets them apart. "Family" can disown you as soon as they disapprove of anything in your life, and "friends" can be there to see you through all the challenging times.


21. It is actually possible to hate AND love someone at the same time. Usually, you love them for who they are, but hate them for what they do or have done.


22. We really do create our own happiness! And only we know how to do that for ourselves.


23. Our parents' marriages in our early years really does influence us in our own marriages. Sometimes, NOT exposing your children to what you don't want them to learn may be the better option even if it means they have 2 homes...which, by the way...


24. Children think it's the coolest thing in the world to have 2 homes and 2 of everything.
    
25. Divorce does not mean you failed at something; in some cases it means you refused to fail at something. "Failure is not falling down, but staying down." (I forgot who said this...hopefully no plagiarism goddess reads this).


26. Having a job in which you are constantly surrounded with people WAY less fortunate than you are makes you SO grateful for your life, even your "broken home, SO not the way you thought it would be" life. :)


27. It is okay to feel sad, happy, alone, full, angry, joyful, etc. all in one day. It is even better to talk about it!


28. Mature, educated people can actually become better people through bad experiences like divorce. While some think of a divorced woman as having "baggage," I think of it as having wisdom, experience, realistic expectations, and rational decision-making.


29. Sometimes a "broken home" in the public's eye is a happy home in the family's eye.


30. Never judge people because you never know their story (and everyone has one). I have become so much more accepting of people.


31. Always be grateful for the adversity life throws at you. The people who have overcome the most are the strongest and we will be the ones who must be there when the people who have not been dealt adversity get their first dose and crumble. Even if those people have caused your adversity.


32. While religion is great for some people, and faith in a god is helpful, it is not necessary in order to be a good person and live by virtuous principles. I am learning the difference between religion and spirituality, and something that I can't quite put a label on nor can I describe.

I will stop for now because I'm sure it will take most people who actually care to read this like 3 sittings. It was more for myself. Journals are so outdated, but I was feeling like I had to document this growth. Until next time, I will call it quits at 32 :)

I forgot to tell this VERY funny story. We all know about our little Emily's sensory issue. Well, this has been her biggest struggle in school. She has a hard time focusing because it's too loud, cold, hot, smells funny, etc. She is always saying she doesn't like school because it's too loud. So the other day she came home and told us with great expression, "Guess what, I had the BEST (you know how she uses her hands so expressively to emphasize words) day today!" Andrew asked her why and she said, " because we all got in trouble and the teachers turned off the lights and there was no talking, but I liked it because it was so quiet!" God I love her!! Haha. I can imagine what the other kids said to their parents about this.

Dinner with my girlies

My grandma has been picking emily up from school, so for the past 2 nights we have been over there for dinner. I know this will be a shocker, but my grandma cooked complete meals...and they were delicious!! (Love you grandma :). Tonight, we decided to venture out and go to Baja Fresh. I don't think I have been out to dinner with the girls for so long! At least at Baja it was okay for them to destroy everything. Plus, with 3 small appetites, we shared a burrito, beans, and rice...and the girls had tons of chips and salsa. They shared nicely. Alyssa dips her chips in the salsa so gracefully. I am glad she's feeling better again. Not that she's ever cranky, but she just wasn't as upbeat last week.

Busy days

We have all been very busy. Andrew is working 50 hour weeks and I was asked to teach a 400 level class at UNR this semester as an LOA, which is a time-consuming second job! Emily is busy with school, homework, and picking on her sister. In the after school program, they are practicing a dance routine that they are performing at half time at a Hug High School basketball game this Friday night. Alyssa love to dance with the big kids when we pick Em up...its so cute! Speaking of Alyssa, she was back at the Dr.'s office last week and was diagnosed with her 6th sinus infection!! Every cold she gets goes straight to her sinuses. So we had to take her off cow's milk products completely to see if it helps and if not, tubes in her ears are the next step :( hopefully all the ridiculously priced goat's milk products will help!

Big helper.

Emily now wants to change Alyssa's diapers!! I'm thrilled. The funny thing is that she tells Alyssa to lay down and Alyssa does. Then she actually stays still for Emily unlike when we change her. Of course, she has yet to do a #2. Yesterday I asked her "what if she's poopy?" Emily said, "I don't care, I will change it." When she finally got the diaper open, she said, "awwww...you do it, I don't want to smell that!"

Lazy day!

Today the girls and I have been doing nothing. I love the long weekends. It has been nice spending so much time with them this weekend. Alyssa was so tired this morning, she took a short nap from 10-11, then went back down around 2:30. Emily have played trouble 3 times. Emily was working away at her art table when I found her doing this....

Fun day

Today the kids and I got to hang out with Misty, which we never get to do. We took the kids to Old Navy, all 5 of them! Somehow, we still managed to have a successful shopping trip. I got 12 shirts, including 3 wool sweaters, for $65!!! I love that store. The kids were actually pretty good. Misty only had to part with about 12 quarters for the machines they have in there.

Balocity

Misty and I told the kids that if they were good at Old Navy, we would take them to Chuckee Cheese. Chuckee Cheese had a line and a wait!!! They were filled to their max capacity. Crazy. So we went to Balocity instead. They all had a blast and it was nice to have the older ones to help with the younger ones. Pictured below is Emily and Anthony through the screen.

More Balocity

Alyssa was in the toddler area, but she wanted to be with the big kids. She would ask for sister the whole time. When emily would come down the slide, they would kiss through the net. Not very sanitary, but o well.

New Years Eve

Andrew's bestie, Randy, was up here for New Years and since we didn't have a sitter, I sent him on his merry way to have a great time. The girls and I hung out. We went to the store and bought some sparkling cider..one for all of us with dinner and one for me after bedtime :). I had bought everything to make a really yummy pasta dish, but at the last minute decided I was against cooking on New Years Eve, so we stopped at In and Out burger. I was just telling Jen the other day that I did not like In and Out. I of course had not had it in years and was taking that statement back shortly after the first bite. The girls enjoyed fries and sparkling cider. They were still in bed by 8:30 and I had a quiet evening.

A couple more pics...

From the blackberry.. Top to bottom...

1. Emily's artset from Grandma Camille..definitely a favorite..Thank You!

2. Emily crashes on my mom's couch from pure exhaustion!

3. Andrew liked the erector set more than Emily.

4 & 5. The microscope was a huge hit for everybody. We found a live ant to put in there and even Alyssa liked looking at it.

A nice weekend!

The girls and I ended up staying in Fernley all weekend. On Saturday, Andrew and Katie were snowboarding and my mom agreed to watch the girls for the afternoon so Peg and I could get some adult sister time in. We went to Pho (a new tradition), and went shopping. Our mission was to buy me some work clothes, but somehow, we came home with 3 bags of scrapbooking stuff and only 2 sweaters from Old Navy. The sweaters were marked down from 27.50 to 10.50, so that made me happy. We scrapbooked all day on Sunday!

Another Christmas

My sister was in town, and at this point, we had not yet seen her. Andrew worked on Friday, so the girls and I went out to Fernley to have yet another Christmas, where the girls got a few more presents. Andrew joined us for Christmas dinner that night.

Christmas Afternoon/Evening

About 1:00, we finally loaded up and went over to spend Christmas with the rest of the Hammonds. It was the most relaxing and chill Christmas day! We opened gifts and just hung out, then ate dinner. The girls were so good. I don't have pics because I forgot our camera. We got some good ones on Kathy's camera, but she took off to New Zealand for 3 weeks so the pics will be posted at a later date.

At the end of the night, we were talking about how bad the girls needed haircuts, and Kathy and I decided to give them both one. Andrew pitched a fit, but was out-numbered. So grandma got to give Alyssa her first cute haircut..no more mullet :) We had to bribe them both with ice cream of course.

Christmas morning...

So we stayed home Christmas Eve night and got the luxury of also staying home on Christmas morning in our jammies until about 1:00. We didn't do much Christmas this year. Working with poor families who have nothing has made it difficult to buy gifts for my children, who really have more than everything they will ever need. Plus, the grandmas spoil them enough that we don't have to (thanks guys :). They each got a couple small gifts that kept them entertained for a while. We re-gifted a lot of their things that they completely forgot about. (This works just fine for Alyssa for now). Emily got a real microscope Andrew picked up on Ebay and an erector set I picked up at Wal-mart. Alyssa got a play tool kit with a hard hat that was her absolute favorite. Andrew and I got a cruise..yay! (haha)

Let's start with Christmas Eve

So I'm going to attempt to catch up a bit...

Christmas Eve, Andrew went to Butcher Boy and got really nice filet mignon! He made the most excellent dinner complete with Bernaise sauce! It was so yummy.

A full rainbow in Reno today!

A cold but beautiful day in Reno. I can't wait to go to warmer weather tomorrow! I just wanted to let everyone know that we are still alive. I will try to blog about christmas/New Years tonight so that when we get back from our cruise, I can blog about that! We are setting sail tomorrow for a 7 night Mexican Riveria and will visit Mazatlan, Puerto Vallerta, and Cabo San Lucas; all of which are supposed to have 80 degree weather!!!! Bon Voyage.